My Three Biggest Don’ts of 2016


2016 has been a brilliant year in terms of lessons learned, hardships and growth as an individual with some incredible moments and beautiful stories. Truly this has been a year which I look back on and remember as the one which pushed me out of comfort zone to mature just a little more. My belief is that we are here on this planet to purify our souls. I believe in reincarnation. I believe in Karma. I believe in the saying “as you sow, so shall you reap.” I believe that we have a short time on this planet and we make the most of it.

Here are my three biggest dont’s of 2016; let’s see if you agree:
Don’t go where you don’t feel welcome:
Three times this year, I have been awkwardly placed in situations where I have been politely insulted at different people’s houses. As a guest, I sat there quietly and observed, barely swallowed my dinner, gracefully sat through the evening and made an exit. Every cell in my fibre screamed, “you’re not welcome.” It wasn’t words per se, but more to do with their behaviour I suppose. I’m a spiritual soul, my soul feels the warmth and the distant behaviour equally. All three times, I came home equally hurt. Very hurt. If you didn’t want me there then why did you even bother to invite me?  Here is what I learned: Once you feel the vibe, find an exit strategy. Also, if you have expressive eyes like mine, let the soul reflect the hurt. Do not be rude, do not be aggressive. Let them see how graceful you are and leave. That impact of them hurting you and you absorbing will stay with them a while. Distance yourself.
Don’t let people’s words affect you:
This year has been tough. I’ve heard many things. I’ve been told my face is too broad, my diet isn’t working, I’m too old to have children, I boast of my closeness to God, I post everything on Facebook to portray an image of being good..and the best one…I was kicked out of a mosque because I am a fitnah for men. It’s okay. All of it is okay. There are many dimensions to human emotional intelligence. When these individuals said these words to me, I absorbed it. I was hurt but my heart said this is their insecurity screaming, their preconceived notions are because of their own exposure to life’s experiences. Don’t let it affect you. I made the mistake of it bothering me to where my appetite died and I didn’t eat properly for a while. The woman’s words stayed with me. They still have. I think of her every time I eat. I hope she’s enjoying her meal though.
Don’t be afraid of your gifts:
Our greatest gift as women is our instinct. When my instinct screams something I’m usually right. My instinct will tell me, caution me of things that aren’t right. My instinct is linked to my dreams. I dream a lot. I see things that are predictive. It doesn’t mean I have the ability to predict the future, it means I’ve been cautioned. What I learned this year was to squash my ego and reach out to individuals and share dreams I had seen. As expected, I was humiliated in return. But the message was sent across. My humiliation is not as big a deal as the importance of the message they received. I’m sure one day those very same individuals will think of me and my prayers for them and their loved ones with a smile and hopefully some regret at their actions. In one of my dreams, a deceased parent of someone addressed me. I’ve never met this parent or seen them. I offered prayers with them in my dream and the sweet soul guided me. I was told that humiliation was sent my way as a test. Would it make me run away from spirituality or towards it? Then held my hand and we prayed together. Other than my father, I think this man’s prayers have been with me this year. He’s found a way into my prayers too. Instinct, dreams, spirituality is a parallel universe it seems. Very few can understand it. Those who don’t, often mock it. Don’t let these individuals affect your journey. Trust your gifts.
I’m looking forward to a brilliant new year of learning and purification. Each year is a reminder that there is a very short time left and I want to live a beautiful life full of happiness. 2016 showed me the beauty of life and love. 2016 also taught me how to heal relationships and be patient with fate.
I can’t wait to grow in 2017.
About Huma Zafar 9 Articles
A fitness enthusiast with a passion for fashion, runs a few successful charities in Pakistan alongside a demanding career. Interests include reading, writing, hiking, exploring, travelling and meeting new exciting people. Believes in giving back to communities, champions education for the underprivileged and supports sustainable micro enterprise development.

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